in participating in what is historically customary, here is an amendment: the weight of the world is the weight of our fear

what stuck with me most was an account of a patient, an ex army man, who swore that he would rather be lowered from a helicopter. he would rather clutch a swaying rope in solitude, no companions except those in the air. he would rather be lowered into unsecured territory. he would rather be a moving target; literally, he would rather be shot at, the subject of enemy fire. no, he would rather be shot. maimed, physically distorted, hurt -- this, in his mind, would be easier, and altogether more comfortable than speaking to a woman, any woman. anyone.